i'm scare

yesterday(13 of may), i register for my hostel at tarc ...

at first, i'm still very excited and happy to stay at a new environment, but then the feeling later is all differ ...
i get key, walk to my room, seeing so many parents were accompany thier children. but, where is mine?
sad enough ....

my room is just beside toilet ... i don't know whether is good or not ...
good is because i can be the first to take bath or others
bad is ....................... i think you all knoe what i meant la ...

back to home, i'm tired ...
parents scolded me ...
"everyday go out till so late back, so hiao ar!! you are a girl!"
i very angry, i just wish to throw something in my hand. but i no did it because i'm really tired ...
i always asked myself, as parents, what they had did for me for my registration at tarc???
everything is just myself doing!!
i cry at them and asked them before ...

night, on bed, i'm crying ...
i really very scare of staying at my hostel ...
noone will understand what i'm feeling right now ...
beside fear is still fear ...
my dear, where are you?

the hostel is not good as i think but is better than worst ...
haha... don't know what i'm trying to say
i start thinking ...
midnight how i go toilet alone? i think i not dare to do so ...
how to bath at there?
period pain how to settle?
wet clothes got to hang at where?
and many many more ...
i'm worry ....

my parents?
they no asked for anything ...
everything is just me the first to say out ...
but they just silent themselves ...
why???why????why???????????

I'M SCARE!!